Custody

Studies show that almost half of all marriages end in a divorce. Although very common, a divorce is a turning point and a painful experience for everyone involved. Apart from the financial and mental issues that a divorce brings, there’s another thing couples need to be aware of: the impact that a divorce has on their children. Child psichologists advice parents not to underestimate the damage that a separation can do to their kids. Unevitably, during a divorce, parents need to decide on who gets custody of the children.  Child custody is going to be an important element in any divorce where children are involved.

Making the best decision for both parents and kids, is not a simple task, especially since divorce often brings resentment. Here are some things parents need to consider before deciding who gets custody.

Keep a cool head. Divorces can turn into bitter fights and endless arguments. Try to put other issues aside and just think about what would be best for your children.
Ask for your children’s opinion. Both parents should talk to their kids and explain the situation and the changes that are about to take place. Don’t be vague about the future and don’t point fingers. Even if you have already made a decision, it’s a good idea to ask for the kids opinion so they know that they are important to you.
Get legal information. In the past, it was very common for mothers to get custody of the children. Today, things are very different. Both mothers are fathers have equal rights when it comes to getting child custody. There are several custody arrangements that parents can choose from.

• Joint legal custody. This is considered to be one of the best arrangement for both children and parents. Joint legal custody means both of the parents share the rights and responsibility of their kids. This includes providing education, health, and generally caring for the children’s well being. They both have to work together and colaborate in the best interest of the children.

• Sole legal custody. Unfortunately this is one of the most common types of custody arrangements. Having sole legal custody means that only one parent retains the responsibilities and the rights related to the children. The other parent may still have visitation rights and other limited rights regarding the children.

• Sole physical custody. This type of arrangement is very different from the sole legal  custody. The sole physical custody refers to the day-to-day care of the children. The parent who has physical custody has the right to have the children live with him. The non-custodial parent still retains visitation rights.

• Joint physical custody. Parents who choose this custodial arrangement will have frequent and continuous contact with the children. They both will see the kids on a regular basis and share the responsibilities and rights. This is very convenient for the children as they spend an equal amount of time with both parents.

Custody of children is a crucial part of the divorce settlement. Although people are no longer a couple, they are still parents, and this is a life long commitment. The decisions they make will affect their children. As long as this decision is taken with maturity and care, everyone will be able to handle better a divorce.

For men specifically who need extra help on understanding the intricacies of child custody, the Divorced Dads Survival Guide is amongst the best resource out there and highly recommended.